I haven’t been writing much lately.
Not only have I not written much here on FB, I haven’t written anywhere else, either. Not on my website, not to my mailing list, not even in my journal.
And if you know me, you know that’s extremely unusual.
It’s not that I don’t have anything to say; I do. A lot, actually. It’s more that I’ve felt unsettled. Things are out of place. Everything is out of place.
This is more than simply being uncomfortable. More than your average unknown.
More like such an uncertainty that it nearly paralyzes you. An anxiety that jumbles your thoughts and makes it difficult to focus.
And the only way to avoid it, the only way to get out of it, to feel even halfway normal, is to clear your mind of anything useful.
To binge watch movies and videos. To go through the motions and hope tomorrow is better than today.
Now, listen – I am fine. Angry. Perhaps a bit stressed. But overall, I am fine. My family is fine. We’re adjusting. We know everything will work out.
But it’s a bumpy ride.